Gratuitous
Dramatis Personae:
- Me, your trusty blogger
- Bug, co-worker and friend. Also a wealthy, crazed Mac devotee. Buys and supports his own office hardware so he can have Macs instead of Dells. Also, I share an office with his wife.
- Anjin-san, co-worker and friend. Shares an office with Bug.
Scene:
Bug & Anjin-San’s office. My workstation is in the process of being mangled by our IT department, so I’m wandering around pestering co-workers.
Bug: I think the fan in the MacBook Pro isn’t working. It’s overheating like a bitch. I’ve been trying to get a Genius Bar appointment, but it’s a pain. So I’m wondering: can I just buy another MacBook?
Me (puzzled, knowing he has the means to buy another): Can you? Of course you can…
Bug: No, no, I mean they appear to be sold out. I’ve checked the Apple Store in Arlington, the Apple Store in Bethesda, the one in Tyson’s. Nobody has them.
Me (jesting): Oh, I just though maybe the wife wouldn’t let you buy another.
Bug: Please. Like I would tell her.
Anjin-san: What about online?
Bug: Seven to ten days before the order even ships. I need one sooner than that.
Anjin-san: The 15″ and the 17″ models are sold out?
Bug: I just searched for the 15″ ones.
Me: So buy a 17″.
Bug: Please. That’s just crazy talk.
I pause. I point to Bug’s desk where his three — yes, three — 30″ Apple Cinema Displays sit.
Me: Dude, you have ninety inches of monitor on your desk, and you’re going to say that a 17″ laptop is crazy talk?!?
Anjin-san: He has a point.
Bug: . . .
Bug: Yeah, I’ve got no response to that.
Me: Just think — if you buy the 17″ and get the 15″ repaired you could put them side by side and have 27″ of laptop screen.
Bug’s face lights up at the idea.
Bug: I like it. But how did you come up with 27?
Me (Levers are pulled. Gears turn. The hamsters run round and round.) : . . . 15 plus 17 is . . . oh. 32. What the hell. I majored in English.
The three 30″ monitors simultaneously turn off as they go into power-saving mode.
Anjin-san: Did it just get dark in here?